How are you doing? Hope you have had a great week. Mine has been a bit mixed, I had one day where I was feeling so low. I can’t really explain why but this feeling of being so overwhelmed swept over me and enveloped me. It was terrible. I was in such a foul mood and I could not really say why.
Thankfully, I was able to look inward for a moment later in the night and it all dawned on me: self-inflicted pressure! I sometimes find myself being me, yes I am Temi and I stress out over things I have no control over a lot. Worriers Anonymous. I have a clear sense of how I want things to go and when I see a puzzle not fitting in exactly how I had envisioned, it just really affects me in the wrong way. I am working on it though and learning how to strike a balance.
I definitely cannot live a complacent life, I really don’t know how to: you know that Jejelaye (easy does it), take it easy, take it one day at a time, chill, relax and go with the flow life. I was not manufactured that way by God. I am a “keep your eyes on the prize” type of human. I set goals and run towards them. But I am learning to be more balanced and trust God implicitly when things don’t go exactly how I had planned.
I shall update you on how that is going…
I had received a number of messages on tpoday’s post and I started it a while ago andf thought today is a great day to finish it up and share. So what exactly are the must haves for your new baby?
As a reformed shopaholic mom, I now know that you really do not need too many things for a new baby. You will be told that you do. Every vendor will peddle his product has a must have. You will watch Youtube mommas marketing the DockATots and the Mamaroos and the Invictus and the Hestios strollers. You will be told how important it is to have all sorts of blankets and all sorts of pacifiers but to be totally honest, if you buy everything you are advised to buy, you will end up broke and using only a fraction of them. I’m shy to admit that till date, a number of items I purchased for Enioluwa are still happily sitting in their individual packs, untouched, 3 years after (please do not show his dad this post).
So what did I end up finding to be a waste of money and space? I’ll keep it very general and I hope the list can offer some guidance as you shop for your baby.
Shoes for babies between 0-12 months old
Trust me, you think you need two pairs of shoes in all the primary colours and several others in different patterns and designs, but you don’t! My two sons hardly wore shoes between 0-6 months (not the Goodluck Jonathan type). They were usually wearing socks or booties. The stress of wriggling their little feet into some of those shoes was enough to discourage me. Even where I manage to summon the will to do it, once it falls out, that’s it! We are going shoeless!
I would recommend no more than three shoes. Rather, invest in cute good quality socks that would stretch out and are sized for a considerable length of time such ass 0-6 months and 6-12 months. Don’t stress yourself (or your baby) with too many shoes. You will hardly wear them.
These babies grow so fast! You blink and they can’t fit into those cute clothes anymore. Refrain from buying too many clothing items! It is just not worth it. I went all out with my first and now, I realise that it was not the wisest idea. He didn’t wear a good number of those clothes. Thankfully, I have a second boy, so I don’t feel as bad for “wasting” money on them anymore.
The same thing goes for things like mittens, blankets etc. You don’t need more than two or three. If you end up needing more, you can easily get them as needed. For those who shopped away from home, there is that additional pressure of “oh, if I don’t buy now, things will be so pricey or unavailable back home”. It is a lie. There is nothing you can’t get here in Naij if you really need it.
Other items I bought that I now consider to have been a total waste are the following:
White noise machine, night light (lol, I laugh at myself when I think about these items), baby monitor (he slept beside me till 10 months, thereafter, slept through the night anyways), special diaper pails and many liners (your regular dustbin with a lid and Ebeano nylon bags will do), crib bumpers, newborn-sized clothes (these never even fit!!!), baby gowns that swaddle up and that you zip (both my boys hated that stuff!), baby bath robes (lol, even I know it was just for a photoshoot), wipe warmer, boogie wipes (I would later find that I didn’t have the time to search for the special boogie wipes with boogie dripping down into his mouth-men you use what you find!), pacifier wipes (same comment as last).
Now to my most essentials: Of course the list is absolutely non-exhaustive but these are what I find most useful…
- Ori/Shea butter
- A few good blankets
- Bibs (this is what you can buy many of and when I say many I mean 6)
- Breast pump (I use Medela freestyle)
- Milk storage containers
- Nursing pillow
- Hands free pumping bra
- Breast pads
- Nipple cream
- Sleep suit
- Diapers (you can DM me for a guide to sizing for the first 12 months)
- Baby bath soap and lotion and oil
- Diaper cream
Babies are resilient little humans. They are usually fine when warm and fed. Don’t go to town thinking you need so many many items as “essentials”. It is okay to splurge, absolutely nothing wrong in it but at least do so knowing you are splurging not because you are made to believe it is a must have.
God bless all our cute little ones and may He give us the wisdom and grace AND funds to give them the best of life. May He also bless those looking to Him for the gift of a child. Amen.